Drink Beer. Ride Faster. Lose the Tour.

Even non-cycling fans know that Floyd Landis is in some kind of trouble. An "A" sample of his blood showed a high level of testosterone after his heroic win during stage 17 of the Tour De France. Now, if the "B" sample also proves positive, that's not good. HOWEVER...

Could it have been the beer? Landis reported drinking a beer after his epic collapse during the 16th stage. Beer increases testosterone level in your blood, according to a study done in 1996.

Unfortunately, you have to drink a lot of beer to achieve the testosterone levels that he achieved. So unless his beer was really an entire keg, Floyd needs a different defense.

Seriously though, I hope it's not true. Not because I think he didn't do it, because, frankly, almost every cyclist dopes. There's a word for cyclists who don't: losers.

But I like Floyd. He seems like a good dude. He's a beer drinker. He gives me hope: I'm a beer drinker too, and someday, I, yes I, could win the Tour De France.

Jeff Learns the Delight of Real Ale...

And suffers from real ale withdraw symptoms, all in the same pub. As a huge fan of cask conditioned English ales, I know the feeling.

CAMRA holds it's annual festival in just a few weeks; I spent a glorious few hours there last year, which is not nearly enough time: with over 500 beers available, and since you cannot order them by the teaspoon, it all gets a bit overwhelming, particularly if you like to drink responsibly.

One more thing about Jeff. He's holding a full english pint, 20 oz versus the U.S. 16. CAMRA is an advocates "honest pints": British consumers get shorted 8 out of ten times they order beer, by too much foam, glass not filled, glass too small, etc, and CAMRA is trying to change that. They also fight for historic breweries and pubs.

We would benefit from such a group. While in St. Louis earlier this year, I had an opportunity to go to a Cardinals game in the new Busch stadium. A 16 oz Budweiser cost $7.00. No, not Czech beer, the American Budweiser, the one without flavor. Yeesh.

The next question is, "what was he drinking?"

Don't do this. Please. Don't drink and drive. Know your limit. Get a designated driver. Know when to say when. Take the keys. Friends don't let friends drive drunk. Drink responsibly.

And tell Pete Coors.

Lady Beer

Researchers in the Czech Republic are developing a beer that helps women deal with menopause. It has something to do with phytoestrogen, and when I said the word phytoestrogen to my wife, she was like "What do you know about phytoestrogen?" And I was like...."uhhhh..."

I do know that if this works, it may be within the reach of researchers to create beers that solve all sorts of health things. How cool would it be to have a beer that induced weight loss? Gave you muscles? (real muscles, not "beer" muscles.) Cured acne? Made you smarter?

Or course, beer makes you feel smarter, which is a start. But I'm hopeful.

Interesting fact: do you know what Xena, Warrior Princess called her sword? You guessed it: phytoestrogen.

Brew Organic

Ahh, the pastoral beauty of an organic world. Majestic, healthy trees, babbling brooks you can drink out of, children who don't have arms growing out of the back of their heads. Yes, doing away with chemical fertilizers and pesticides is nothing but good-good-good.

So it seems to make sense that organic beer would be good for you. And yet, there is trepidation out there when Anheuser Busch introduced two organic beers into several test markets.

So what's the deal? There is concern, perhaps legit, that when a great big player enters the organic market, they will be motivated to get the government to the lower standards of what makes something organic. They'll put the economy-of-scale beat down on organic farmers. They'll screw everything up. It's the same fear organic enthusiasts have about Wal-Mart, who recently announced it's intentions to expand their offering of organic food.

The counter argument is, of course, that if A-B offers organic, organic will be cheaper. More significantly, organic malt and hops will be cheaper. That's an issue. I homebrew, and I consider organic, but compare grain prices at the Seven Bridges Cooperative versus say, The Grape and Granary, and there's a pretty good jump in the cost of raw materials.

Now, as far as A-B organic offerings go (Wild Hop Lager and Stone Mill Pale Ale, if you're looking for it), I believe that the skilled craftsman at the brewing giant will be as succesful as ever at eliminating every last bit of flavor from their all natural beers. Flavorless and flawless, as the saying goes.

Me? When I want to love my mother through beer drinking, I reach for a Samuel Smith Organic Lager, readily available, or the less widespread yet very tasty Lakefront Organic ESB.

It's sort of related to hops.

One from the hometown. For longer than anyone can tell, the Hockhocking Brewery building in Nelsonville Ohio has stood empty, but apparently not that empty. Police have found several marijuana plants on top of the dilapidated, but otherwise grand structure.

There is interest in redeveloping the brewery into condos and shopping space(what Nelsonville needs, and I hope you are getting my sarcasm.) In an odd twist, police are looking for the owner of the building as they investigate the garden. It appears that the guy who is developing the site forgot that he left his weed in it. Is it me, or is that a totally stoner thing to do?

DRINK THIS BEER: Moondog Ale, Great Lakes Brewing Company

And drink this seasonal soon, as Moondog is out in limited release from the skilled brewers at Great Lakes.

Excellent from the tap or bottle, this is GL's version of an English Bitter: more bitter than English, I might say, but outstanding none the less. Great Lakes calls it a session beer, but at 5% ABV, I'm thinking you should bring a designated driver to that session (from the SLWB editor: always do that. Don't drink and drive, you dolt.)

The stats: 5% ABV, 25 IBUs, 100% tasty.

World Cup of Beer

Good article from nj.com, a reporter and some friends created a World Cup of beer They called it the "World Beer Cup", apparently not knowing that such a thing already exists.

Anyway, England, represented by Sam Smith's Nut Brown Ale, beat Mexico's venerable Negra Modelo in the final. Considering how England faired in the actual football tournament, perhaps knowledge of this victory (and a pint or three of Sam Smiths) will help ease the pain.

One beer mentioned in this article that is well worth the effort to drink is Brazil's Xingu (pronounced SHIN-goo) Black Beer. It's hard to find, but really fantastic.

Drink Beer, Live Forever, Part 2

Yet more research on the overwhelming evidence that beer is the healthiest beverage in the world, this time from the website Express India. This is a nice article, including a quote from a scientist who claims that beer is better for you than red wine. He's an Anheuser-Busch scholar (those really exist?) but whatever.

While there, check out the rest of the Express India site. Via the World Wide Web, one can be a world traveller without the expensive airfare and annoying case of malaria. And while you're at it, enjoy a Kingfisher, a popular Indian lager with a killer website to boot.

Beer on Beer Violence

I found this on YouTube, via the website jaunted.com. You may very well find this helpful, dear reader (Literally. One person reads this blog.) the next time you are faced with opening a beer bottle without an opener, and your freak friend who can open bottles with their teeth is nowhere to be found.